Lonely, I walk alone

Lonely I walk alone

bereft of the joys,drowning in pain

amid'st the shattered hope

and the echoing past..

boulevard of shattered dreams,

I walk through

engulfed by despair

and the spelchral atmosphere

I know not where I am

Searching for my pantheon

The dreams I once had

The hopes that I once lived

I wish I had not known you

Perhaps my life could(still) have its hue

Your mere shadow was so virulent

So perilous and turbulent

Perhaps I would have lived

If mere breathing is life

I might have been happy

if state of oblivion is joy

But why is it

your rewarded afflictions

are for me most treasured

and your smile,makes my world shine

Why all your castigation,rebukes

are my most ardent desires

Why do I feel a dagger through my soul

and ironically relish while the sinner I behold.

Your mere deference I mistook

bonhomie I misjudged

Perhaps I was the sinner

basking in the glee of my utopia

Or was I too late

never saw the love for me that await

elusive,lost in my own world

Unaware,your love I besmirched

Now why do then I lament

and carp about

my unrequited love

Is all that I deserve

Then why do I hope for you

when I happily curtained myself away

why do I still hope even for a stare from you

maybe your yelling ,or even your anger would do

For that would rekindle my hope

That you still think of me,though so low.

I wish I had'nt met you

but now that I know you

You are the best thing that happened to me

And all my life will cherish these sweet pains

You might forget

You might not have even known

that once our paths did cross

And thats exactly where I am still lost

You gave meaning to my life,would be sheer exaggeration

but You alone have the power

to touch my intangible soul

till now in a deep slumber,I was just breathing

You are the one who made me alive..

Coz you are the best thing that happened to me....

Though now lonely I walk alone..

PS: Please do not think that the poet suffers from a heartbreak or is out of love. It happens to her often that she finds it easier to express feelings of loneliness and sadness as compared to that of joy. Perhaps she is a pessimist,or perhaps she understands these emotions quite well,cause it is only in their presence you realize the true essence of happiness..

LOL.. ;)